Biggest Million Dollar Money Drop Winner Ever: Badass Couple Takes Home $300,000 (Recap)

Biggest Million Dollar Money Drop Winner Ever: Badass Couple Takes Home $300,000 (Recap)Million Dollar Money Drop Gives Away $300,000 to Hilarious Couple

Normally every Thursday night, I watch The Biggest Loser at the gym while running on the treadmill. I have good wind but have the attention span of a 4-year-old iPhone addict with ADHD and a meth problem, so unless football or the biggest loser is on the treadmill TV, I can’t really run for more than two miles. For some reason, I find The Biggest Loser incredibly captivating while on the treadmill, but it was on commercial, probably because the contestants needed another injection of Fritos, so I switched over to Million Dollar Money Drop on Fox.

On Million Dollar Money Drop were Nathan and Luna, the most awesome couple ever to be on reality TV. Nathan was a tall bearded funnyman in his late 20s; Luna was a short, pretty latino girl with lots of quips. Together, they blew through seven questions, getting every one right, on their way to $300,000. The only downside was that host Kevin Pollack was generally pretty annoying, and seemed annoyed that they never made a remake of a Few Good Men.

I was captivated and impressed. In 60 seconds, they managed an average of four-to-five quality one-liners. “On what ingredient wasn’t on a Big Mac: I’ve never seen anything red on a Big Mac that was supposed to be there,” Nathan, later, on the penultimate question of whether men or women get more speeding tickets, with the clue that the correct answer also got more reckless driving tickets and seat belt violation tickets: “I got a reckless driving and seat belt violation ticket while pulling out of a McDonalds!”

Amazing. So deserving of $300,000. If they went with their gut instincts every time (the answer they put the most money on) they actually would have walked away with the entire million. So they were pretty smart, too.

I seriously suggest watching this show while running. Every time the money dropped and their biggest pile remained, it sent a shot of endorphins to my brain. It was like someone put an MDMA drip into my headphones (if you did put an MDMA drip into my headphones, thanks, but I’m probably going to hate you tomorrow).

I seriously ran seven miles while watching this show. And now I kind of want a girlfriend. That never happens. Then again, maybe I just want to get a girlfriend and go on Million Dollar Money Drop (for the record, I knew all the answers this show because I’m really intelligent). Then, I’d probably grow disillusioned and find a way to screw her out of her half of the money. She’d probably spend it on crap, anyway. You know how imaginary girlfriends are. What a bitch.

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Joe Lazauskas
Editor of The Faster Times. Managing Editor at Contently. Twitter: @joelazauskas ...read more

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