The Fallback Plan for Short Attention Spans

The Fallback Plan is a weekly column, offering advice to those undergoing a second adolescence, written by Leigh Stein, author of The Fallback Plan, newly released from Melville House. For an illustrated fallback plan of your own, write to Leighstein@thefastertimes.com

Dear Leigh,

I want to learn all about meter and form, but I have a short attention span, so do you know of any good places to eat around here (Pasadena, California?) Also, your author photos are very nice, I like overalls. (I think those are overalls) Sometimes, I want to be a girl, because girls are nice looking. (Relevant information: I’m a boy.)

What should I do?

Sincerely,
Anonymous (Boy)

Dear Boy,

Celiac Disease is a serious health disorder that affects at least 1 in every 133 Americans. For many of us, living in the treetops a la Swiss Family Robinson has always been a dream, but as the middle class vanishes in a plume of car exhaust we must contend with the reality of just visiting trees on the weekends. “Sorry you were born the wrong gender,” my nana used to say, unknowingly giving me the title for my new memoir. Take heart and be not discouraged. Every time you see an adult in overalls, you have a new character to add to your roman