Four NFL Mascots to Come Out as Furries on Same Day

Arizona Cardinals v Atlanta FalconsAn NFL punter with knowledge of the situation announced on Thursday that four separate NFL mascots might come out as furries on the same day in the near future. The announcement has elicited mixed reaction across the league.

The term “furry“ has several definitions, including people who like to role play anthropomorphic characters while wearing furry costumes and people who are sexually aroused by furry costumes.

“I’m talking about the kind that like to bone each other,” said the punter, who asked to remain anonymous.

Furries-rights supporters are hopeful such a coordinated move would further push public support toward their cause.

“This could be huge for guys like me,” said Arctic Liger Sexy Claws from the lobby of a furry fandom convention in Tallahassee. “It would show the world that we are just like everybody else when we’re not having wild orgies in panda costumes.”


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Norman Stern
Norman Stern is a Texas-based writer and editor. more


  • GreenReaper

    Nice try, but a) there are no furry conventions in Tallahassee, and b) Sexy Claws is a porn name, not a furry name. That said, sports fans may be interested in the writings of fandom writer Kyell Gold, who has created a series of novels around a football player who comes out (as gay; they’re all furry).

    • Tantroo_McNally

      Mr. Reaper, look at the title of the page…. “All of the news, only some of it true” this is probably an “Onion” type parody site ;P

      • GreenReaper

        I know – that’s why I said “nice try”. :-)

        • M. D.

          Reaper’s right… the only furry conventions I’ve attended were in Vegas, San Francisco, and Queens, NY.

          • Phoenix Audubon

            Don’t worry, there’s more where THAT came from!

    • Joel Taylor

      Hey Mr Raper: Sexy Claws isn’t a porn name to me.

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