Unless you’ve been living in a cave, you can’t have helped but notice that all eyes are on Copenhagen where world leaders and officials are gathered over the next week or two to see if they can hammer out a deal on climate change — or not, as the case may be.
So far, things don’t look too rosy. Just yesterday, on day two of the conference, developing countries were up in arms at a leaked draft agreement, allegedly prepared by Denmark as host of the conference, which reveals that the world’s rich nations have apparently outlined, without negotiation with the G-77, what they are prepared to do on climate change — which pretty much sidelines the UN and hands greater powers to themselves in climate negotiations .
Denmark’s prime minister went on the defensive saying that Denmark had put forward no such document. He had better be convincing. First the Muhammad cartoons enraging the Muslim world, now carving up a secret deal on climate change infuriating the whole of the developing world — it seems like Denmark might be as popular as North Korea right now.
Almost as much as news on the climate proceedings themselves, there’s predictably plenty of juicy, non-environment-related stuff that the press has been getting its teeth stuck into.
Bob Dylan’s song “A Hard Rain’s A Gonna Fall” was adopted as the unofficial anthem to the conference, although, unfortunately, Bob himself wasn’t wheeled in to perform. Let’s hope that its meaning hasn’t been lost in translation to the 192 delegates. Now, it’s not that I want to gripe too much, but do all conferences really have to be “sexed up” by having their own theme song? Perhaps they should start also handing out medals to accompany the soundtrack in a closing ceremony. “And the gold medal this year in combating climate change goes to … Libya.”
On the seedier side, prostitutes have been targeted in a campaign by Copenhagen city officials encouraging conference participants to “be sustainable, don’t buy sex,” while a group of prostitutes responded by offering free sex to those conference delegates with a legitimate pass. Now, I do hope that was not lost in translation to some of the excited guests.
In another episode of silliness, Christmas trees have been banned from the conference venue; apparently the venue turns into neutral UN territory, so overt cultural or religious symbols have no place. Well, can’t they at least have something greenish in there, a cactus or a palm tree perhaps!? Otherwise the place will be about as sterile as a hospital isolation room.
Perhaps more pertinent is the fact that, according to the British Daily Telegraph, the 1,200 limousines and 140 private planes, plus caviar wedges, descending on Denmark’s capital city will produce the same amount of carbon dioxide as a medium-sized city. At least it seems, though, that the 200-odd bicycles provided to participants by the conference organizers have been put to good use despite the December cold and gloom that afflicts the whole of Scandinavia. But, then again, perhaps some people are using them to sneak over to the low-key climate change skeptics’ conference also taking place in Copenhagen this week.
On a more serious note, the conference represents a chance for Copenhagen not only to make the history books — where were you on December 18 when the world was saved? (or lost for that matter) — but also to strut its credentials as one of the greenest cities in the world.
But why not hold the next conference somewhere where climate change is actually being acutely felt? In Greenland (Danish territory by the way), for instance, where the world’s leaders could then rough it together and learn from those already losing out to climate change, instead of staying in swanky European hotels with all the mod cons consuming caviar wedges. Picture Obama bunking up with Hu Jintao of China along with a few other leaders in an igloo with an Inuit — now that might go a long way in enhancing their understanding of the environment and our place in it.
Deal or no deal, the world’s going to end in 2012 anyway, or at least that’s what Roland Emmerich would have us believe. Given that Denmark’s highest land point is just 170 meters above sea-level, it might just need a giant ark or two…
Photo by americaspower
Alec Forss
Alec Forss is a researcher and free-lance writer originally from the U.K. Intrigued by the Scandinavian origins of his surname, he has travelled extensively throughout the region, drawn in particular by wood-fired saunas, long summer evenings, ...
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