EBay Back-to-School Shopping Guide (Photos)

Summer’s almost over, and that means one thing: you’re headed back to college/high school/online correspondence school/prison literacy program/cult-like religious home-schooling/second master’s degree. You’re probably wondering, “what are the hottest school supplies this fall that I need to impress my classmates and hopefully avoid becoming the victim of cyberbullying (again)?” Well don’t worry, I’ve got you covered with a list of the coolest items available RIGHT NOW on the internet’s most trusted garage sale, eBay.com. Hurry, these auctions for someone else’s used crap won’t last long, so reach into mom’s purse, grab her credit card, set up a PayPal account, and bid high!

Trapper-Keeper featuring Rabbits. Rabbits are the new owls, people!

Speaking of rabbits, what better way to strut your stuff in the cafeteria than with this Lisa Frank soft lunchbox featuring bunny ballerinas? You’ll be the envy of the whole football team!

Or maybe you’re like me, and are so nervous going to first day of school that you secretly bring your favorite stuffed animal with you. Now you can masquerade your social phobias and age-inappropriate love of stuffed animals by using the lunchbox as a pretext for toting around this Alf plush! This one’s “fur” you, young future furries and plushies!

Attention grad students: your tweed blazer with leather elbow patches isn’t going to impress the Freshmen Writing Basics class you’re proctoring. THIS is the pencil case you need to get their respect:

And of course, the must-have item this fall is a set of vintage nudie-pens (see a full demonstration in the photos on the eBay page):

Hand-made, one-of-a-kind Lady Gaga notebook? Yup.

Perhaps you want to knit your own back-to-school themed vest, and need a pattern?

And if it all doesn’t work out (school sux, remember), you can just go ahead and buy our own diploma on eBay. Here’s one that certifies you as a graduate of the 1950 America Pigeon Racing Association, Pennsylvania chapter.