Parenting expert Penelope Leach has a new book, and it’s already making waves for its claim that so-called “cry-it-out sleep training” can cause brain damage. According to Dr. Leach, scientific tests show that when a baby’s cries go unanswered, his brain begins to produce the stress hormone cortisol. This is apparently very bad for brain development—Leach told the BBC, “Some neuroscientists describe it as toxic.”
Before we go any further I should probably disclose that “cry-it-out sleep training” was exactly the method my parents chose to use on me, and as my mom explained it, things seem to have gone pretty smoothly. The first night I cried for over an hour, long enough that my mom finally had to take a break and walk around the neighborhood while my dad kept watch. The next night I cried for 30 minutes, the night after that, only for 5 minutes, and then that was it.
(This marked the beginning of what turned out to be a relatively short-lived period of parental bedroom privacy, since as soon as I was big enough to walk, I started regularly making my way back to my parents’ bed every night around 2 a.m., a situation that lasted for years. I suppose we were “co-sleeping” in the “family bed,” except that those terms weren’t around back then. But all of that is a whole different story.)
Leach told the BBC that she’s not “getting at parents” in the book, The Essential First Year-What Babies Need Parents to Know, just trying to provide them with good advice grounded in science. But honestly, her claims seem to be more an attempt to drum up some controversy in the interest of marketing than anything else.
Strollerderby recently posted something about this, and as many of the commenters pointed out, it is unclear exactly which studies Leach is referring to. She’s not that clear about the details in the BBC interview, but my guess is a baby would have to cry regularly over at least a period of a few weeks before it became problematic. I am sure that if a baby’s cries regularly go unanswered this has a negative impact on her, and not just physically, either. But it is hard to imagine that letting a well-cared for baby to cry herself to sleep a few nights in a row could be damaging. If crying for half an hour had a life long impact on all children, wouldn’t we all be scarred? Besides, having a worn out, dead tired mother can have a negative impact on children, too.
But hey, as I mentioned, letting me cry it out for a few nights was my mom’s method of choice, and since I don’t consider myself brain damaged, I am probably a bit biased. What about you? Which side of the debate do you fall on? And (probably most importantly) do you have any good advice for parents trying to help their kids sleep through the night?
Photo by Brandon Baunach
Molly Langmuir
Molly Langmuir does remember what it was like to be on staff at a magazine, although these days every magazine she has ever worked for is closed. She blogs at mollykay.tumblr.com, has a journalism degree from Columbia, and has written ...
Read more about Molly Langmuir ->
jessica says:
I have three sons. The youngest is now a year old and doesn't sleep through the night. I have never been able to let my sons cry it out. Actually, I have never wanted to, since it goes against my motherly instinct. I'm not familiar with Leach's book, but I'm glad someone is addressing the crying-it-out issue.
Kathryn A. Higgins says:
We called it "Ferberizing" because it was from a book by a Dr. Ferber -- the idea that you should let your kids cry themselves to sleep, increasing the time each night. All my friends were doing it. I tried this once. Found it unbearable, and then realized my infant daughter had a fever. That was the end of it for me. I nursed my kids in bed and they slept with me. They are now 13 and 11 -- confident, well-adjusted and healthy. I decided that letting them cry it out was unnatural and bizarre and I'm glad I abandoned that method. Imagine this: an infant is born -- has lived its entire life in your body, and then it's expected to sleep by itself down the hall. I'd rather have a cub.
BluebirdMama says:
Can we just discuss for a minute the idea of damaging the brain? I don't think Leach is trying to imply that these babies end up with permanent cognitive damage for instance, or impaired ability to funtion in society. But perhaps the babies end up with a new set point in their brains where an elevated level of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline is their new normal. Then these babies grow up to have life-long issues with elevated stress-responses. This very thing has been documented in premies who have very stressful early days including separation from their mothers and painful tests. All of this happens while a baby's brain is still developing and it definitely absolutely does shape the architecture of the brain. But this baby will grow up thinking it is normal (as you do), because it IS normal for them. But we also live in a culture where stress, anxiety and depression is normal. Who is to say what the root of that issue is?? I was also left to cry as a baby and I deal with depression and anxiety as an adult...is that because my brain is wired to "need" elevated levels of stress hormones?? It could very well be.
And I refuse to risk passing that on to my own kids. Period.
DB Cooper says:
Checked in here to find the scientific basis for the claim. Found the typical "I did it this way and can't imagine what sort of monster would do it the other way" b.s.
Molly Langmuir says:
I wish Dr. Leach had been clearer about the scientific basis for the claim, too. Without knowing what studies she's talking about, it's hard to know what kind of circumstances she's referring to, and what kind of damage they can produce. It's hard for me to imagine that letting a baby cry herself to sleep for three nights would produce a lifelong elevated stress-response. But I certainly don't think that means there is one right answer for everyone. Obviously, if the cry-it-out method feels terrible to a parent, there's no reason he or she should do it. I definitely don't think someone who would make a different choice than my parents is a monster. They're doing what's right for them.
For what it's worth, Babble recently published another piece about this. In it, they (it's by the editors) say they couldn't find evidence of the scientific basis for Leach's claim. They did find recent studies that point to the idea that chronic stress can be very damaging to children (no surprise there). But basically they come to the same conclusion I just mentioned - that each family should figure out what works for them.
If you want to read what they had to say it's here:
http://blogs.babble.com/strollerderby/2010/04/26/dont-believe-the-hype-the-cry-it-out-sleep-method-doesnt-harm-babies/
Shannon LC Cate says:
It all depends on the baby and the parents. There are a thousand different approaches that will work well. I don't believe in caveats in parenting with the exception of "never hit" (adults or children). I don't believe in signing onto any one theory or practice. I believe in the complexity of human relationships which means figure your baby out, figure yourself out and come up with something that works as well as possible for that combination of people.
As with any relationship there will compromises.
Shannon LC Cate says:
It all depends on the baby and the parents. There are a thousand different approaches that will work well. I don't believe in caveats in parenting with the exception of "never hit" (adults or children). I don't believe in signing onto any one theory or practice. I believe in the complexity of human relationships which means figure your baby out, figure yourself out and come up with something that works as well as possible for that combination of people.
As with any relationship there will compromises.
P.S. Generally speaking, I like Penelope Leach. But again, I don't sign onto wholesale anybody's theories.
cec says:
I have read a lot of literature on sleep and it is a particular focus in my work with new parents, an article like the one being discussed is alarming and should have a base of good research behind it, and my question is when you pick up a crying baby and it continues to cry loudly in your arms, is that not equally damaging or does the fact that the parents is there decrease the cortisol level?
Although I am sure the parents level increases. As I have not read either the book nor the research, I am not sure if this is dealt with and I am concerned about the guilt we place on mothers and their choices.