justice Justice Department Reading This as I Type It skater First Openly Straight Figure Skater Comes Forward homeless-man-smiling Homeless Guy Woos Silicon Valley VCs with Low-Tech Crowdfunding Startup DSM-manual-5th-ed “Cra Cra” Now Official Diagnosis in New DSM (DSM-5)
Nonsense News

Porno at 20,000 Feet: Ryanair Plans In-Flight Porn App

I'll be damned if that guy isn't creepy-looking

Ryanair boss Michael O’Leary wants porn on his flights.

Well, you know, sometimes when the baby in the seat in front of you starts crying loudly, or the elderly woman sitting next to you just won’t shut up, you just wish you could start watching people have sex on your iPhone, right?

Mr.O’Leary, CEO of the budget airline, said he wants to launch a pay-per-view porn app that would allow passengers to enjoy pornography on their iPads or smartphones while flying Ryanair, raising the question of who would possibly use this service.

The service, as planned, would also allow passengers to do things that actually make sense on a flight, like playing games or gambling.

O’Leary has also recently proposed such bright ideas as removing all but one toilet on Ryanair flights, or charging passengers for using toilets.

O’Leary clarified to The Sun, “I’m not talking about having it on screens on the back of seats for everyone to see. It would be on handheld devices. Hotels around the world have it, so why wouldn’t we?”

To which the resoundingly obvious answer is: Because you’re an airline, dumbass.

More From Erik Oster:

Highlights From Yesterday’s Promoted #McRib Trend

Has Fred Durst Gained Self-Awareness?

Tags: , , , , , , , , ,
Erik Oster is an Assistant Editor at The Faster Times and a writer, editor and musician from Fairfield County, Connecticut. After graduating Goucher College in 2008 with a degree in creative writing, ...read more

Comments



Follow Us

Most Popular

Faster Links


The Onion

The Daily Show

Rhymebuster: a rhyming rap dictionary