Scandal Rocks London After Newest Royal Caught Sucking Kate Middleton’s Breasts

kate-middleton-breastsAll of England was shaken today after British tabloids reported that the newest member of the royal family has taken a keen interest in Kate Middleton’s bosom. The reports claim the newest member of the royal family has been sucking on Kate Middleton’s breasts and that the activity goes on all day and night.

“He can’t get enough of Kate’s breasts,” said a member of the Duchess of Cambridge’s household staff, who refused to be identified. “Whenever he’s not sucking on them, he’s looking at them and making crude gestures with his mouth.” Added the source, “And if he doesn’t get to suck on her breasts, watch out. He’ll throw an absolute tantrum.”

For her part, Kate Middleton is refusing to comment on the rumors about her breasts. Prince Harry, however, has reported his unhappiness with the situation. “If there’s going to be a scandal involving the sucking of Kate Middleton’s breasts, I’d really like to be involved in it myself,” he said.

Buzz Feldman
Buzz Feldman is a writer and blogger in Brooklyn. ...read more

Comments

  • Sympathetictokate

    Why don’t people just stop talking crap about Kate and her baby. How could a household source make a stupid inane comment like that about Kate and her baby when she’s not even at the palace. Some people are just downright ignorant and should just let the couple alone. Newspapers flog a subject to death and make it boring, They should fire the lot of you and get responsible reporters. And ‘no’ I don’t waste money buying the tabloids.

    • Guest

      Some people certainly are downright ignorant indeed. Well said.

  • yeahright!

    “said a member of the Duchess of Cambridge’s household staff, who refused to be identified.” – oh come on!

  • Larry Jones

    I have a feeling this story was first announced in the” Onion” so called paper.

  • Lanie

    This is ridiculous.embarassing for the British tabloids.all the moms who breastfeeding including me n medical staff n people who knows breastfeeding,we all knw that this not so true.babies that age they only eat sleep n poop.

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