NHL Playoffs Picks Game 4 (Friday 5/6): Bruins Sweep Flyers
NHL Playoffs Picks – Friday: San Jose Sharks at Detroit Red Wings, Philadelphia Flyers at Boston Bruins. Game Four Predictions
Happy Seis de Mayo. It’s not quite as catchy, but I feel lucky to be one of the only sober people in the world tonight. I’ll have no hangover for my business pitch to Entenmann’s at 7:00 am.
I had a pretty good read on the Predators-Canucks game. I got the score exactly right until an empty-netter ruined it for me, and I predicted Ryan Kesler to notch the game winner. Hopefully some of Thursday’s success carries through into two elimination games. The Bruins will sweep the Flyers in Game Four on home ice, quickly getting revenge for last year’s collapse. The Red Wings will find a way to hold off the Sharks to force Game Five.
San Jose Sharks at Detroit Red Wings (-130) 7:00 PM Game Four (3-0 Sharks)
Picking the Red Wings to win the Stanley Cup is like having sex but not being able to finish. I got it up with no trouble by picking a perennial contender at the beginning of the year. I penetrated the postseason with ease as a three seed and division champion. Everything was going great, but I just can’t finish up. One goal losses continually tease me with sensations of ejaculation only to disappear into numbness. Now, desperate and panicking, am I really going to pull out unsatisfied?
The Red Wings outplayed the Sharks in Game Three, but a goal in the final minutes forced overtime and the Sharks pulled off their third consecutive win by just one goal. It’s hard to count out the Red Wings because of how well they played in the first round. I said this of the Caps and it appeared to be a kiss of death, but I can’t picture a team this talented being swept.
Jimmy Howard deserves better than his winless record in the second round. He’s played relatively well. The Red Wings offense cannot be bottled for an entire series, could it?
I’m not ready to give up on Detroit. One game at a time. If they can get it to 3-1, they’re just one more road win from forcing Game Seven. Plenty of teams come back from 3-1. It could happen, right?
Red Wings 3 – Sharks 1
Philadelphia Flyers at Boston Bruins (-170) 8:00 PM Game Four (3-0 Bruins)
Get your brooms out Boston.
The Celtics look just awful against the Heat, and I’m predicting a sweep. Just kidding, what I really want to talk about is the most expensive last-place baseball team in MLB history.
New York loyalties still make it really hard to bet on Boston. Still, they’re playing the Flyers. I hate the Flyers, and I have no real issue with the Bruins so I’m pretty happy about this series so far. If you’ve come this far in the article to be turned away by my obvious biases, stay for the 500 dollars I’ve won since the playoffs started. Just because it feels good, doesn’t mean it’s right – and it doesn’t take actually boning that fat chick to learn it. I got into bed with the Flyers in round one, and now I’m turning on them in round two because it’s the right pick.
I just get to feel extra good about being right this time.
Because of how poorly the Flyers goalies have played, I hoped a three-game lead would be possible for the second straight year. The Bruins offense was effective enough to beat Brian Boucher and whoever else limped into net, and it’s really hard to bet against Tim Thomas. Chris Pronger is still questionable, which likely means he is out for Game Four because you can’t trust a playoffs injury report. Without Pronger, the Flyers aren’t a great team.
I’m so happy. The Bruins have taken a three-game lead on the Flyers for the second year in a row in convincing fashion. The Flyers came all the way back last year, but not this time. As I’ve said before, if their skeletons in the playoffs closet were last year’s Flyers disaster, never winning a series after losing the first two games, and historical struggles with the Canadiens, then the only one still in the closet is Philadelphia.
It all makes sense. The Broad Street Bullies are the homophobic jerks that punch the nerdy gay kid and break his glasses only to try to kiss him in the locker room. Get your brooms out, but be careful because the Flyers might try to do something funny with the handle.
Bruins 5 – Flyers 3
Follow us on twitter@thefastertimes