Amber Rose, Kris Van Assche, Kanye West and Chris Brown at Van Assche’s show. Photo courtesy of Getty.

Looks as though musician-cum-fashionphile Kanye West has proselytized a new recruit. Chris Brown, the latest maligned celebrity to be embraced by the seemingly forgiving fashion world, was snapped in West’s company throughout last week. I have no idea whether these two are in fact friends. But I don’t like the precedent.

Though most idiocy typically ensues in New York (witness She by Sheree, the upcoming Kardashians for Bebe presentation and Ashley Dupre front row at Yigal Azrouël) our foolios flocked to the men’s shows in Europe. Despite MTV’s denials vis à vis West, neither of the two were ostensibly welcome at George Clooney’s Hope for Haiti telethon Friday, a star-studded concert that might have attracted both just a year ago. With West’s Taylor Swift takedown and Brown’s Ike Turner 2.0 maelstrom still fresh in everyone’s minds, this was essentially a given.

Kanye West and Amber Rose at Louis Vuitton. Photo courtesy of Dominique Maitre.

While West’s admittedly been a front row fixture with frequent escort Amber Rose for a while now, he’s loath to go low-key. This is at least due in part to Rose’s sartorial stylings (or lack thereof). Most notably, there were the matching full-length furs at Louis Vuitton and Rose’s nausea-inducing shredded dress at Kris Van Assche. Brown was also in attendance at the Belgian designer’s show, glimpsed grinning despite the knowledge that he didn’t belong, or staring at the camera with faux-pimp stoicism. I didn’t bother keeping track of where Brown made his Milan and Paris pit-stops, but according to his website, the singer attended at least nine shows, often clad in the designer’s wares. And if you um, want to “get Chris’ looks,” the site has provided a series of links via ShopStyle. Seriously.

Jean Paul Gaultier and Chris Brown at Gaultier’s show. Photo courtesy of Dominique Maitre.

While I found that last tidbit laughable, not so Brown’s post-show pic with designer Jean Paul Gaultier. In it, Gaultier stands, hands folded, half-smiling despite his (fake) bloodied, banged-up mug. Brown, one arm around Gaultier’s shoulder, has a tight, awkward look on his face, as if he kinda-knows-he-shouldn’t-be-doing-this. To use Tyra parlance, he ain’t smilin’ with his eyes.  To put the image in context, Gaultier’s show was roughly themed around the gym–boxing specifically–replete with “bruised” models. The designer himself saw fit to indulge, hence the makeup. Now, there’s no way in hell Gaultier’s PR could have been ignorant of Brown’s criminal past. Perhaps they’re looking to drum up a little publicity for that new Target collab? Even if they didn’t care whether the Brown pic would ignite controversy, the singer’s handlers should have known better–one “friendly” post-show pic isn’t worth it. To quote a colleague in attendance of Thursday’s show, “that was gross on so many levels.”

Target’s mascot

To add insult to injury (too easy) Brown told WWD that he was “open to any propositions in the fashion field, though he would prefer to collaborate with a label rather than launch a full line under his own name.” I’ve made my feelings toward ersatz celebrity designers known before, and this is yet another ridiculous example of a young multi-hyphenate looking to re-ignite his career.  Given the time dedicated to cataloguing all of Brown’s men’s show moves, not to mention just about every outfit he wore last week, perhaps his people are in fact looking to re-brand him as a fashionisto. Regardless, it may be a very, very long time before anyone touches Brown sans kid gloves. Or boxing gloves, as it were.

Priestess NYC blowfish print jacket

Priestess NYC designer Cody Ross is a hustler. He might initially balk at the characterization, but he also couldn’t legitimately deny it, either.  I first met him at a party I was covering in Soho over a year ago–one of those über-crowded but ultimately lackluster events where the free booze is by far the best part of a not-so-deep-pocketed journalist’s evening. I dodged the clutch of quasi-celebs and squealing socials clamoring for camera time to find my friend, who introduced us. Upon learning that I was a writer (and which pubs I contributed to) I had his attention. Ross took off his shades and told me he had something for me.

It was then that I noticed the oversized bag he had been lugging around, filled with samples. “Here, have this,” he said, handing me a cropped gray cotton zip-up. Typically I only ever received goodies after writing about someone, but this wasn’t the way Ross did business. I held up the garment, eyeing the voluminous sleeves and slightly nipped waist. The lining was patterned in a black and white animal print. “What size is it?” I asked. “Medium,” he replied. “But if you need small just let me know and you can switch it out.”

Priestess NYC fractal print pants and cloak

Going on the advice of our mutual friend, I followed up with Ross, who, true to his word, allowed me to exchange the medium for a small. Unlike most designers, Ross wasn’t there that night to enjoy the champagne and make small talk. Like me, he was there to work. Part of his savvy, I soon learned, came from the business world, where he worked as a financial analyst in London, Shanghai and New York prior to launching Priestess NYC in late 2007.

While earning his Bachelor’s at the London School of Economics, Ross also began indulging his artistic proclivities, beginning with evening courses at Central Saint Martins. There he became intimately acquainted with all manner of textiles, pattern-construction, draping and sewing–an ideal counterpoint to LSE’s intense econ curriculum.

Priestess NYC distressed denim shirtdress with spikes

“I think about the design process as following a random and unpredictable path,” Ross explained recently, alluding to the very sorts of market vicissitudes also inherent to finance. Not surprisingly, his background proved invaluable to nearly every facet of building a brand, from sourcing fabrics to generating hype. “You’re mining data, defining expectations and really, believing in the value of an idea,” he says.

Because design ultimately remains subject to external forces, including fiscal downturns or the mood of the culture, “the process requires constant adaptation in terms of production and execution.” Subsequently, everything affects everything else. Ross adapts by simultaneously focusing on the here-and-now and keeping an eye to the future. When it comes to anticipating trends however, he relies upon intuition–and what he likes.

Priestess NYC cotton-blend fish print jacket with sperm print lining

One favored aesthetic: kitsch. Admittedly drawn to both the freaky and the absurd, the designer garners inspiration from the outré. “I like incorporating ornament, humor and paradox,” he says. “Kitschy stuff can be funny, obviously, but also stimulating.” To wit, Ross uses both over-scaled “blow fish” imagery for SS/2010′s  multi-hued cotton jackets, and a quirky sea creature-print for his cotton/canvas toppers.

While we were on subject, I had to ask: what’s up with the “sperm” print this season? “I use it as a lining on a few jackets,” Ross replies nonchalantly. And? “I’ve been reading up on the subconscious,” he adds facetiously. Those with the um, balls to don it, also have the option of a black and white, sperm print cap-sleeved cotton minidress.

While Freud’s influence ostensibly figures in the collection, another man’s predominates: meteorologist and mathematician Ed Lorenz, an early pioneer of Chaos theory. Lorenz–responsible for coining the term “butterfly effect”–also published related images of something called the “strange attractor,” piquing Ross’ interest. Lacking his math geek savvy, I asked the designer to elaborate. “It’s basically an infinitely layered structure…that underpins the ‘chaos,’” he summarizes, excising a couple ten-dollar words to put it in layman’s terms for me. The result: a collection of bold silhouettes and intricate geometric patterns, culled from a fascinating, if unlikely source.

Ed Lorenz's "Strange Attractor"

Ross also discussed two new developments to the collection, including his collaboration with Norwegian artist Marianne Aulie, known for her kitschy clown abstractions and large-scale “fractal dimension” drip paintings (I see her appeal). According to Ross, the duo’s currently developing styles, to which Aulie’s prints will ultimately be applied.  No word on whether those looks will also include unisex, but Ross did add a few guy-friendly pieces to Spring. “The new stuff is just a natural outgrowth,” he explains of the decision. “It ties in well with the directional nature of the range.”

Cody Ross and Marianne Aulie

Anyone following fashion these days knows a burgeoning designer’s future is at best, uncertain. Ross, however, seemed optimistic when we spoke–with good reason. Despite the sluggish retail sector in North America, Priestess NYC is posting impressive growth, aggressively expanding its presence in mainland China and elsewhere. “I’m making serious in-roads into cities beyond Shanghai, Beijing and Shenzen,” he says, noting the fact that China, a stable profit center, represents over 40% of the label’s revenue. Seems as though all that time spent abroad–not to mention Ross’ fluency in Mandarin–came in handy.

If prompted, I could easily list my favorite pieces for Spring: the black cotton-stretch slashed leggings, the metallic gold leather jacket, and the multi-colored, fractal print dress. All are on my wish list, but in the meantime I’ll settle for an old favorite: the original, easy-yet-edgy gray zip-up. A year later, countless compliments suggest Ross was on the right path from the get-go.

All photos courtesy of Amanda DeSimone.

Every season, a quick perusal of the New York fashion week calendar typically elicits a few anomalies: the it-designer just decamped from London; a quirky duo’s much-hyped presentation canceled amidst rumor and innuendo; the once omnipresent, commercial stalwart currently showing “by appointment only.”

Then there are cases like that of one Sheree Whitfield, conspicuously sandwiched between Lela Rose and Derek Lam on a Sunday afternoon last September. Like fellow Real Housewives of Atlanta castmate Lisa Wu Hartwell, Whitfield has a clothing line, She by Sheree, which she débuted at the Metropolitan Pavilion. Granted, I didn’t attend the show, but I did see pictures. And they weren’t pretty. In fact, to borrow the preferred putdown of yet another sorta-Housewife, Dwight, I’d call the collection “dreadful.”

Most people, including “celebrities,” should not have their own clothing/jewelry/shoe lines, period, particularly when they were never known for their sartorial savvy to begin with. Co-signing the look of a chunky-heeled pleather boot or fur-trimmed velour hoodie does not a designer make. Admittedly, most celebs don’t get into the game to ultimately gain entrée into the Council of Fashion Designers of America–they do it for money. Ashley and Mary-Kate Olsen, who oversee design of luxury basics label The Row and handle the branding and marketing of Elizabeth & James, are one (well, two) of the more notable exceptions to this rule. The former child actresses and occasionally kooky style arbiters were inducted into the CFDA earlier this year, essentially accomplishing the fashion industry’s equivalent of getting an Oscar. Whereas the Olsens legitimately seem invested in the design, marketing and overall execution of their collections, the majority of stars are not. As Ashley Olsen put it at Wednesday evening’s “Future of Fashion” talk at the 92Y, said celebs often only “get involved to have a licensing partner, to add to their brand.” Interestingly, Olsen also said she did not approach design “from a celebrity standpoint.”

Ashley Olsen and Issac Mizrahi at the 92Y

Celebrity clothing lines, hereafter designated as “CCL”s, probably aren’t going anywhere anytime soon.  In fact, they may continue to proliferate, despite the recession, the typically poor quality of the garments, and the lack of direct involvement by their namesakes. I’ve assembled and categorized eight lists, heavily weighted by my own  opinion, but also bearing in mind the retail markets (both here and abroad) as well as the opinions of the critics, bloggers and pop culture junkies without which CCLs would be nothing. Some of these lines no longer exist, while others are currently in development. A few may never see the light of day, and most of them shouldn’t have to begin with. Some are casualties of a crappy economy, while others were doomed before first markdowns. Here are the (few) good, (mostly) bad, and often, very, very ugly.

Worst Name For a CCL:
Akoo, aka A King of Oneself (T.I.)
FuMan Skeeto (Chris Kirkpatrick)
Aneres (Serena Williams)
Be@one (Heather Mills)
Clandestine Industries (Pete Wentz)
Rich Young Society (Fabolous)
Heidiwood (Heidi Montag)
Chick by Nicky Hilton (Nicky Hilton)
Miss Tina (Tina Knowles)

Crazies and/or Divas With Jewelry Lines:
Susan Lucci (Susan Lucci Jewelry)
Janice Dickinson (Janice Dickinson Jewelry)
Tina Knowles (Miss Tina by Tina Knowles)
Patti Labelle (Patti LaBelle)
Pamela Anderson (The Pamela Anderson Jewelry Collection)
Christie Brinkley (Christie Brinkley Jewelry)
Celine Dion (HV Love)
Kelly Bensimon (Kelly)
Paula Abdul (Forever Your Girl, Innergy Collection)

Most Egregious Attempt to Capitalize:

Jonas Bros. (Jonas)
Tori Spelling (Little Maven)
Miley Cyrus (Miley Cyrus & Max Azria)
Lindsay Lohan (6126)
The Real Housewives (Real Housewives-Royal Plush)
Justin Timberlake (William Rast)
Paris Hilton (Paris Hilton)
Kanye West (Louis Vuitton collaboration)
Beyoncé (House of Deréon)
Donald Trump (Trump Signature Collection)

Most Commercially Viable…
Sean Combs (Sean John)
Jay Z (Rocawear)
Kimora Lee Simmons (Baby Phat, KLS)
Nelly (Apple Bottoms, Vokal),
50 Cent (G-Unit)
Gwen Stefani (L.A.M.B.)
Russell Simmons (Phat Farm, The Russell Simmons Collection),

…Not to Be Confused With Stuff We Might Actually Wear:
Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen (The Row, Elizabeth & James)
Twenty8Twelve (Sienna & Savannah Miller)
Victoria Beckham (Victoria Beckham)
Milla Jovovich (Jovovich-Hawk),
Elle Macpherson (Elle Macpherson Intimates)
Chloë Sevigny (Chloë Sevigny for Opening Ceremony)

WTF??:
Al Roker (Weatherman, The Al Roker Collection)
Kenny Chesney (Blue Chair Bay)
Reba (Reba)
Liam Gallagher (Pretty Green)
Scott Weiland (Scott Weiland for English Laundry)
Jill Scott (The Butterfly Collection)
Ivana Trump (Ivana Trump Haute Couture)
Dina Lohan (Shoe-Han)

Celebs Who Wouldn’t Be Caught Dead in Their Threads (Promotional Appearances Aside):
Jessica Simpson (Jessica Simpson Collection)
Hilary Duff (Stuff by Hilary Duff)
Ashlee Simpson (Wet Seal collab)
Jennifer Lopez, (J-Lo, Sweetface)
Amanda Bynes (dear)
Sarah Jessica Parker (Bitten)
Mischa Barton (Mischa Barton Handbags)

Obscurity Suits You:
DMX (Earl Simmons Signature Collection, DMX Authentic)
Alyssa Milano (TOUCH)
Elizabeth Hurley (Beach)
The Real Housewives (Real Housewives-Royal Plush)
Lauren Conrad (The Lauren Conrad Collection)
Avril Lavigne (Abbey Dawn)
Sheree Whitfield (She by Sheree)

Photo courtesy of Sheree Whitfield.

Photo courtesy of Joyce Culver for the 92Y.