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January Jones Can’t Act! (Video)
Branwyn Lancourt
November 16, 2009

090401 january jonesaspx ss image 6 January Jones Cant Act! (Video)

After having to endure an entire season of “Mad Men” focused on the insufferable Betty Draper character as well as the physical stress brought on by all the excess oxygen I expended screaming to anyone who would listen about how horrible an actress January Jones is, I felt somewhat vindicated this past Saturday night watching her crash and burn so spectacularly in her turn as host of Saturday Night Live.

In fact, the internet is abuzz proclaiming her to be one of the worst hosts in the history of the program. I personally don’t see how anyone should be surprised by this, as she’s a turgid, one-note bore as Betty in “Mad Men.” As I said before, having to sit through scene after scene dedicated to her character this season was totally infuriating. I mean, where was Red? Where was Pete or Peggy? Jesus even Don was second banana to this thoroughly uninteresting and unpleasant character played as woodenly as a tree stump by the untalented January Jones. A few friends of mine would say, “It’s a testament to her acting skills that you hate her character so much”, but that’s baloney. January Jones brings absolutely no depth to the character whatsoever. Her portrayal is a collection of curt, lemon faced monosyllables, and peevish facial expressions. Another more competent actress could bring perhaps SOMETHING else to the table.

Now, I know you’re going to say she was nominated for a Golden Globe, but that doesn’t impress me. After all, didn’t Marisa Tomei win the Oscar for that grating shitfest of a performance in “My Cousin Vinny”? Eff the Golden Globes!

As far as her attempt at comedy this past Saturday goes, she was an utter disaster. Flubbing lines, robotically reading off the cue cards, not exuding a scintilla of anything remotely resembling funny, it was a positively cringe inducing experience having to sit through it. Like I said from the beginning, she can’t act, OK? Hopefully now that her character has been shipped off to Reno (revealed in the finale of this season’s “Mad Men”) we won’t have to deal with her anymore. Still, I feel gypped out of a proper season.

I will say this, in person she does seem like a nice, likable sort and nothing at all like that stick up the ass pill Betty Draper. Unfortunately I still loathe and resent her for ruining this season of Mad Men for me.

In a recent article, Jones spills that her ex-boyfriend Ashton Kutcher was not supportive of her career, and didn’t believe in her acting skills. Well, as painful as it might be for me to agree with Ashton Kutcher about anything, I have to side with the Punk’d-meister on this one.

Hopefully next season of Mad Men will be Betty-free. Hmmmm… Maybe her plane will crash on the way to Reno? Or perhaps an alcohol induced coma? That would make it up to me I think.

Here’s hoping.

Branwyn Lancourt is an “ex-semi-rockstar has-been”, with a penchant for saddle shoes, misanthropy and fried pork rinds.  His personal heroes include Reggie Jackson, Elvis Costello and the original Darrin from Bewitched. Feel free to join his forum The Lifeboard where he’s usually hangin’ out discussing the news of the day. You can also friend him on Facebook, if you’re into that sort of thing.

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Just your average, ordinary, every day malcontented misanthrope. My disdain for the current state of popular culture permeates my very core. Hence, I feel obligated to tug on your coat about it until you’re just as nauseated as I am. ...

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  • Jeramy

    Well, this was pointlessly harsh yet typical of the internet. I happen to find Betty a fascinating character. I know she’s always been a divisive figure on the series, but she’s not going anywhere.

    Jones is a capable actress. Her stoic delivery is purposely fusrating. I can’t say whether she’s a great actress or not, because I would have to see her in substantial roles beyond Betty Draper. But being a bad SNL host does not make one a bad actor. Robert DiNiro was one of the worst hosts they’ve ever had

  • http://www.walruscomix.com/forums/index.php Branwyn Lancourt

    I don’t buy that it’s “purposely frustrating” I just think that’s her lack of ability to emote…

  • Connor

    This is one of the many reasons I hate the internet. It makes things too expensive and it gives people an a forum to voice their opinion when the barely have the ability to form one to begin with. Thanks internet, you cold heartless bastard.

  • http://www.walruscomix.com/forums/index.php Branwyn Lancourt

    oh really, do go on, does it really, give “people an a forum, when the barely have the ability to form one..” ?

    You fucking muldoon… you don’t even have the ability to form a coherent fucking sentence! Go cry in a corner.

  • JOHNNY

    branwyn, your no daisy, your a potty mouth and i hope you wind up on santa’s “naughty” list. curious ; what’s a “muldoon” ? and why are you so angry ?
    “there are very few statues built to honor critics”. there, some clever bloke said that. your a great example of how the internet is changing art, science, and everything in between, starting with the human communication cycle.
    please establish some credential before you attempt to assassinate another artist. in my world, your all hat and no cattle. another angry voice in the den. and january jones is far more attractive (LOL?).

    unsolicited advice is not polite so let me conclude with this; you COULD go decaf dude.

    have a quality day

  • http://www.walruscomix.com/forums/index.php Branwyn Lancourt

    decaf is for wussies.

  • James

    “Mul⋅doon
      /mʌlˈdun/ –noun
    Robert David, 1921–92, New Zealand political leader: prime minister 1975–84.”

    Oooooo, burn. Nice one Branwyn.
    Whether his grammar was correct or not (@Connor: if you’re going to insult someone, at least spell/grammar check first, otherwise you’ll look like a twat) he’s right. Branwyn, you are an excellent example of why the internet sucks. “Unfortunately I still loathe and resent her for ruining this season of Mad Men for me.” Really? She ruined the entire season for you? Then you’re a puss who needs to get the fuck over it. This little article was just a chance for you to get to be an asshole to someone who can never rebut against your comments.

  • Deanne

    Your hatred towards January Jones comes across as very personal and very disturbing. I hope she has a bodyguard.

  • Nancy

    I just spent the last weekend watching the first season of Mad Men (I’m a little behind the times) and I couldn’t agree with you more! January Jones CANNOT ACT! Yes, her character is supposed to be repressed and controlled, but a half-way decent actress would be able to indicate some sort of feeling or energy below the surface. One of my biggest frustrations was trying to decide which word described her best – wooden or leaden. I can’t believe so many people like her portrayal. Talk about the emperor’s new clothes! Keep speaking truth to blockheadedness.

  • HBomb

    Although this seems a little harsh, it’s tough not to agree that another actress would have done Much more for the show. Shame too, I think Mad Men is one of the top shows out there

  • Stir the Turd

    You people are surprised this guy is angry? Look at his pretentious photo and name. There’s a lot of painful high school beatings in those eyes.

  • Emily

    Thank you thank you thank you. January Jones is a terrible actress!!! She was cast based purely on her looks. Too bad her high ratings in the beauty department don’t bleed into her acting skills. This woman has NO depth. She is shallow. And it’s not because she’s supposed to be vapid. Peter Campbell is disliked and no one is saying he can’t act. Salvatore doesn’t have many lines but he still delivers a well-rounded character. For the amount of screen time Betty gets, she is a real downward pull on the greatness of this show. When she recites her lines, I feel like I’ve had a lobotomy.

  • carolee

    I agree with everything you wrote.it’s very frustrating to have to watch a show where the primary actress is completely monotone throughout, which is a shame because mad men is one of the best shows out there. my friends constantly defend her acting ability,blaming her line reading on the repression of her character, but I refuse to buy that.
    thanks for this :)

  • Moe Lester

    Stir the Turd is hilarious. I totally agree. Life has beaten Branwyn into the shriveled, pale faced man-child Edward Scissorhands you see in the photo. But, he has his soap box here and we’ve listened. Well, until I caught wind of his internal hatred spewing out.

  • SD

    Well, I guess the folks that decide the Emmy nominations disagree with you. I tend to think of that as a good indicator of acting ability. I’m sure you’re going to go on and on about why they are idiots and don’t know what they are talking about, yada yada, but being nominated for any significant award in Hollywood does tend to lend credibility, right?

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