Charles Darwin Writes a Letter to Stephen Hawking
Stephen Hawking has just published a book that seems to challenge incumbent Charles Darwin for the title of ‘most loathed scientist’ by religious fundamentalists.
World renowned physicist Stephen Hawking has just published a new book titled The Grand Design. According to Hawking, the aim of the book is to answer questions like, why are the laws of nature what they are, why do we exist and did the universe need a designer and creator? The Grand Design, which is scheduled to be released on September 7th, is drawing harsh criticism from the religious community because its conclusions specifically state that there is no need to invoke God as an explanation for existence.
Charles Darwin writes a letter to Stephen Hawking
Dr. Stephen Hawking,
I am sending this correspondence out of admiration of your recently published book, The Grand Design. Although I am not a physicist by trade, in my assessment I found the text of your explanations to have been written with a clarity, thoroughness rarely encountered in popular works of the sciences; undeniably the book was both informative and inspiring. However, dear sir, at the risk of confusing my professional appraisal of your theories with my own personal motivations, I must be completely honest as to the true reason for holding your publication in such regards, and indeed the real purpose behind this current letter.
Since publication of my abominable theory of natural selection in the Origin of Species, I have been bombarded with continuous assault, and insult, from the pious in our shared world community. My publications have been banned, burned, intentionally misconstrued and even cited as the works of the devil. Despite having paid little time or mind to harebrained allegations of being a pointy-tailed marauder, I must confess that I have found religion’s interference with science, and the pursuit of knowledge in general, to be the most disheartening of experiences. In short, dear sir, thank you for deflecting the gaze of the religious eye from me and my field of interest – the biological sciences.
Not since publication of the Origin of Species in 1859 have I been so at ease; and remember dear sir, I have been dead since April of 1882! Now finally, after all of this time, religious zealots of every ilk, sect and creed can take a break from their incessant efforts to ban the teaching of evolution. Now, thanks to you sir, these fools can focus on other issues they deem to be of importance – unfortunately the issues they deem important will likely include banning instruction in chemistry, physics and astronomy…
With the most sincere of gratitude,
PS: If I may be so bold as to offer a parting word of advice, you may wish to inquire into the availability of fire retardant book covers for your publication.
Image Credit: Wikipedia
Video posted in reply to a comment (Sean Carroll on Hawking):
Follow us on twitter@thefastertimes
- 1 Brooklyn Man Now Living Entirely Off Own Beard Garden
- 2 “Cra Cra” Now Official Diagnosis in New DSM (DSM-5)
- 3 OfficeMax Marketing Director Struggling to Make Staplers ‘Sexy’ and ‘Conversational’
- 4 First Openly Straight Figure Skater Comes Forward
- 5 Area Man Tailors Life To Be More Relevant To His Hulu Advertisements
- 6 Fan Banging Furiously on Glass Could Be the Difference in Hockey Playoffs
- 7 Survey: 88% of Eagles Fans Too Drunk To Spell Nnamdi Asomugha Last Season
- 8 Attorney Actually Starting to Believe Own Bullshit
- 9 Homeless Guy Woos Silicon Valley VCs with Low-Tech Crowdfunding Strartup
- 10 Local Mom Won’t Stop Being First Person to Like Every Goddamn Thing Son Posts to Facebook