Sarah Silverman on the Prolapsed Anus and Other Brief Observations
It’s crazy that every culture has music. It’s like, WHY?
If I could pick my own condition, I’d pick rosacia.
I just saw the future and it’s terrible.
I’m not lazy – it’s just that I have a very active dream life so I have to be there a lot.
When toddlers burst into tears I pretend it’s either over Pakistan or trapped Chilean miners.
I’ve been poking holes in my birth control pills.
I think of all potential health problems, I’m most scared of the prolapsed anus.
Follow us on twitter@thefastertimes
- 1 Brooklyn Man Now Living Entirely Off Own Beard Garden
- 2 First Openly Straight Figure Skater Comes Forward
- 3 “Cra Cra” Now Official Diagnosis in New DSM (DSM-5)
- 4 OfficeMax Marketing Director Struggling to Make Staplers ‘Sexy’ and ‘Conversational’
- 5 Area Man Tailors Life To Be More Relevant To His Hulu Advertisements
- 6 Homeless Guy Woos Silicon Valley VCs with Low-Tech Crowdfunding Startup
- 7 Fan Banging Furiously on Glass Could Be the Difference in Hockey Playoffs
- 8 Survey: 88% of Eagles Fans Too Drunk To Spell Nnamdi Asomugha Last Season
- 9 Attorney Actually Starting to Believe Own Bullshit
- 10 Local Mom Won’t Stop Being First Person to Like Every Goddamn Thing Son Posts to Facebook