I have finally accepted the premise that, “Girls mature faster,” and I am now dating men at least ten years older than me (I am 26). But I still seem to attract the same young jerks that didn’t turn me on in school. Any advice?

Enid

Dear Enid,

When an “older” man checks you out, the first thing he notices is the kind of cellular device you are wearing. If that interests him his eyes might wander to your long shapely legs, your sweet young…anyway, I think you get the idea. I hope this has been helpful,

Sincerely,

Jonathan katz

The post Bad Advice For Women appeared first on The Faster Times.

I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for four years. I recently found out he cheated on me about two years in. When I confronted him, he broke down, said he felt terrible and would never do it again. He says it was just the one time and I believe him. Obviously this has been on my mind, and the weird thing is…the thought of him with another woman sort of turns me on. I don’t like the idea of him sleeping around, but for some reason the idea of watching him with someone else is hot. I absolutely do not want to give him permission to cheat, but now I can’t get it out of my head. How do I reconcile this fantasy I’d never want to actually come true?

Kinky Prude

Dear Ms. Kinky, What turns one person on may disgust another. What is important is to document the event about which you fantasize, but to do it in a way that does not threaten your relationship. I get the sense that you love each other and he will be true to you. You should try acting out this fantasy with an older, more experienced man, and a young woman that you find attractive. Film it and send it to me for an honest evaluation. Only then can I truly determine your commitment to this man which is really the central issue.

I hope this has been helpful,

Jonathan Katz

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Recently at work a person I do not respect was promoted over me, and is now my direct superior. This person has, in my opinion, received preferential treatment as a result of being friends with the big boss. He is irresponsible and does sloppy work. Now I have to work twice as hard to make up for his shortcomings as a supervisor, but I am so furious about this turn of events it is affecting my own work. I’m nervous to complain and I’m not sure who to go to — squeaky wheels are not appreciated at my company. What can I do?

-Jealous Guy

Hey Jealousy,

Jealousy, including professional jealousy, is an ugly emotion. I myself have felt professionally jealous of people. What helps is remembering that no matter how successful they may become, they will never be able to really enjoy your company because you don’t like them.

I hope this has been helpful, Jonathan katz

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Recently, my girlfriend was using my computer. Later that day, when I checked my email, I realized she had not logged out. Not wanting to spy, I immediately clicked the log out button, but as I did, I noticed an email with the subject heading “problems with [my name].” Even if I wanted to read it, it was too late – the site logged her out and that was all I saw. Now I don’t know whether to mention it to her, or if I should just worry silently. I swear I wasn’t snooping but how can she believe me?

-Snooping in Seattle

Dear snoopy, In any relationship, privacy is an issue. We come into this life alone, and when we leave we are ultimately alone. So in the meantime, mind your own fucking business.

I hope this has been helpful,

Jonathan Katz

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I’m a writer/editor recently laid off from a web publishing job. Now I’m looking for steady work but it’s been hard to find. A friend of mine, also in publishing, was also laid off. She’s been very generous and helpful letting me know about potential job opportunities, even jobs she might be applying for herself. But when I hear about a job opening first, I tend to keep it to myself, knowing that informing her about it would only invite more competition. I feel guilty, but work is scarce these days. Am I being selfish?

Dear Selfish,

Without selfish people we would not have bridges to cross or tunnels to enter. We would not have wonderful novels to read or movies to see. If Beethoven had not been selfish he would have written for the recorder. For you to be anything less than selfish would be a true act of selfishness.

I hope this has been helpful,

Jonathan Katz

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I recently broke up with my boyfriend after living together for two years. In that time we’ve purchased a number of items together, some rather expensive, such as furniture and electronics. Now we can’t seem to have a conversation about how to divide up those items without it ending in fighting and tears. We’ve tried several times to sit down with a list and work it out, but it always gets too emotional. We don’t want the expense of hiring a lawyer. What do you suggest?

Cheap and Emotional

Dear Miss,

Sounds like a near miss. Sorry. It is easy to say “in retrospect we should have anticipated this day.” I recommend saying that for now. Litigation is expensive and won’t resolve anything.

I hope this has been helpful,

Jonathan Katz

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Last month I was caught nibbling on some small produce items at my local grocery store. A manager scolded me, saying that sampling was stealing. I understood and promised not to do it again. Then, last week I bought some vegetables there that, when I got home I realized had gone bad. By the time I returned to the store and asked for a refund, the manager refused saying it was too late. Now I feel justified returning to my “free sampling” habit, to make sure I don’t buy bad produce again. Do I have the right?

Sampler

Dear Sampler,

Often in life we are tempted to sample things ranging from a cookie to someone else’s wife. What makes us different from other species is our ability to blend in at places that are frequented by people.

I hope this has been helpful,

Jonathan Katz

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