Swing Dance Lessons Fail to Bring About Sex
In what’s being called a “profound disappointment” and “ridiculous waste of time,” St. Paul, Minnesota resident Mark Craig says that 12 weeks of swing dance lessons failed to get him laid even once.
“It’s extremely upsetting,” said Craig. “All that time and energy for nothing. I didn’t even get a hand job out of it.”
Craig said that he signed up for the course despite the mockery of his fraternity brothers because he was sure it would lead to “mad pussy.”
“I did the gayest moves out there on the dance floor,” said Craig. “I even wore suspenders one time. It just doesn’t seem right.”
Craig says that he won’t be returning to the class and is considering a lawsuit against the dance company.
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