Who The Hell Is Adele’s Ex-Boyfriend?

The identity of Adele’s ex-boyfriend, inspiration for her hit album ’19′, is still unknown.

I know a lot about Adele’s ex-boyfriend. Except for who he actually is.

Adele talks about her ex in almost every interview that she gives, including her most recent one in Out Magazine’s June issue. She says, “he’s still the love of my life.” She credits her ex as the inspiration for the majority of her hit album, ’19′. She even cried over him at the Brit Awards.

She recently revealed to The Sun that one of her boyfriends even asked her for a cut of the royalties from her album “19,” her debut album that their relationship inspired.

She refuses to disclose his name, and despite all of this media attention, his identity is still unknown. So why doesn’t her ex do it himself?

Even though he would surely be elevated to “Biggest Douche Bag In The World” status for hurting everyone’s current favorite British chart topper, he would also immediately become a celebrity, maybe even just as big of one as his ex-girlfriend, for Adele is nothing (lyric- and theme-wise) without her ex-boyfriend.

Adele Befriends Her Ex: Who The Hell Is Adele’s Ex-Boyfriend Part II

I want her ex-boyfriend to be out there, talking about her to the press (and by press I mean me, Alex Hughes, at The Faster Times) just as much as Adele’s talking about him. I want to hear his side of the story. What does he think about their breakup? What does he think about becoming an unnamed symbol of asshole-y-ness?

But what I really want to know is that her ex-boyfriend is actually a real person, and not just made up. Adele has done enough of backhandedly trashing her ex, Lady Gaga, Katy Perry, and every other musical artist who uses their sex appeal or tries to make money through co-branding and advertising. Is it bad that I want to finally hear someone say something negative about Adele?

So, Adele’s ex-boyfriend, if you’re reading this, please reveal yourself to the world. I’m sure you’ll be able to get some magazine covers and countless interviews. Do everything that Adele hates: some advertising, co-branding, and demand that you get some of her royalties, because, you, myself, and everyone else know that Adele’s hatred toward you is the reason that she’s successful. You’ll probably be hated by most of the world, but that doesn’t really matter. Tons of celebrities are hated and become permanent fixtures in the news cycle. Maybe you’ll even get a VH1 dating show where you try to find a soulful singer-songwriter who won’t bash you all over the press. “I Love Adele’s Ex-Boyfriend,” anyone?

Follow Alex Hughes on Twitter for more news! @TheAlexHughes

Alex Hughes was born in the Bible Belt and moved to New York City to study. He is an editorial assistant. Follow him on Twitter @TheAlexHughes. He can be contacted at: alex@thefastertimes.com ...read more

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